Blame It On Me
by majestyofhearts
Summary: When Kairi returns to Destiny Islands after her two years of absence, things are not how they used to be. Her relationship with Sora has never been more distant, and she tries her best to win his heart back.
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1  
**

'_I spend the last 2 years getting to what's real, and now I can see so clear. I hope you feel just like I feel.' – _

**Nolita Fairytale, Vanessa Carlton**

Kairi opened her attic window and popper her head through it. She smiled at the sight of the beach water, sparkling in the light of the setting sun. It had been two years since she had last taken in the sight of Destiny Islands, and she had truly missed it.

She had moved away two years before with her adoptive parents to Traverse Town, leaving everything she loved behind. Leaving _him_ behind.

Then Kairi's adoptive parents had decided that Destiny Islands was their only home, and her father, with his power as the mayor had very easily gotten back his old job. Fortunately their old house was never sold after they have moved, so they were able to live there again. And now she was here.

'Kairi, will you come to the beach tomorrow with us?' a voice came from behind her. Kairi looked around and thoughtfully eyed the blonde girl that was sitting on her bed.

Sensing her hesitation, Namine stood up and put a hand on her best friends' shoulder. 'I don't think he'll be there, to be honest. He stopped coming along with us a long time ago,' she said. Kairi nodded. 'I'll be there,' she said and smiled. 'Say Namine, I'm going to visit their house tonight.. What do you think it will be like?' she then asked doubtfully. Namine was on her way the door, but stopped in her tracks. 'I hate to tell you this, but don't expect much of it. You'll have to see for yourself what the situation is like. Call me afterwards to give me a full report, alright?' she said and gave Kairi a hug. 'I'll be off then, I'll see you tomorrow!' she continued and walked out of Kairi's room, maneuvering her way through the unpacked boxes that were on the ground.

Kairi watched her friend leave and then collapsed on her bed with a deep sigh. There were still a lot of boxes that needed unpacking, but she didn't feel like it. In fact, she didn't feel like doing anything at all, she even dreaded her visit of that evening.

In the time that she had been away she had only kept contact with Namine and Riku, since they were her best friends, and that was pretty much it. But she understood, because her other friends had their own lives too, and she hadn't expected them to send her emails or text messages occasionally. Apart from the emails she got on weekly base from Namine and Riku, she had gotten emails and text messages from him every day. Sora. Even though he was her best friend too, she hadn't answered any of his attempts to get in contact with her, and after a while she started deleting his emails without even reading them, for one simple reason. She didn't want to be reminded of him. The hardest part of leaving Destiny Islands had been leaving Sora behind, without having being able to tell him how she really felt about him. After that she decided that she wanted to forget all about him, heartbroken as she was. She had tried so hard to get over him, but he had been in her mind every single moment for the past two years. She had never been able to get over him, she realized that now. But she was afraid of meeting him again.


	2. Chapter 2

**Blame It On Me**

**Chapter 2**

'_A strangled smile fell from your face. It kills me that I hurt you this way.'_

– **Whatever It Takes, Lifehouse.**

Kairi checked herself in the shop windows over and over again. She nervously adjusted the zipper on her dress, doubting whether she should go back and change into something else. She was wearing a pink dress that cling to her slender body. Underneath it she wore violet shoes with the laces carefully tied around her skinny ankles. She thought she looked okay, but the tight knot in her stomach grew tighter every step she took.

It was already getting darker outside, but still light enough to see everything clearly. Not that Kairi needed that, because she could find her way through these streets with her eyes closed. She used to visit Sora's house all the time, and it felt strangely familiar to be visiting him again.

She stopped when she had reached his house and hesitatingly walked up the steps of the front porch. She was about to knock when a sudden fling of panic withheld her, and she turned around and walked of the porch again. Behind her she could her the front door opening and a low voice called out her name.

She could've very easily make a run for it, but she didn't want to be a coward. If she wouldn't pay this visit now, she would have to do it some other time, so it was better to do it straightaway. Kairi turned around again and looked at the tall figure that stood in de door opening. A surprised sound left her mouth. Roxas had changed a lot since she had last seen him. Namine hadn't exaggerated a bit when she had said that he was even more handsome than before. Roxas hair was blond and less spiky, unlike his brother's, but they shared the same bright blue eyes. But that was, as far as Kairi could tell the only thing that hadn't changed about her friend. He had grown a lot taller, and had obviously been working out a lot. His blue shirt revealed his muscles, and Kairi presumed he had a six-pack.

Roxas walked forward and embraced Kairi. 'It's good to see you again,' he said softly. Kairi hugged him back, and for a moment tried to believe to it were Sora's arms around her, not Roxas'. The embrace ended quickly though, and she was brought back to the reality of things. She silently followed Roxas into their cozy house and walked into the large living room.

'He's in the garden, but Kairi, I didn't tell him that you were coming,' Roxas said awkwardly as he leaned against the wall. 'Things haven't exactly been easy for him. I watched him get languish slowly. He took it all very badly, and the only thing I can say about him is that he is miserable at best. I'm sure you had your reasons for not contacting him, but for the sake of my brother I have to ask. Why didn't you ever mail him back? Or text him? Or answer his letters?' he asked and looked at Kairi. There was no anger in his voice, just concern. Kairi could tell that he was really worried about Sora, and she wondered how bad things really were.

'You have to understand me Roxas, I just couldn't. I was really heartbroken and I thought that I wouldn't ever return here so I figured it was best to just forget about him, and go on with my life, hoping that he would do the same thing. But I never knew it was affecting him this much,' she replied, looking at her own feet. When Roxas didn't reply Kairi walked to the door that led to the back garden. Before she opened the door she peeked through the blinds of the window.

Sora was sitting on the ground with his back against a tree. He was playing on his guitar, but she couldn't hear what because the door was closed. Roxas was not the only one who had changed, his brother had too. Even from his sitting position, Kairi could see that he wasn't that skinny small boy that she remembered anymore, but a tall young man. His dark brown hair had changed to a lighter shade of caramel brown, but was still as spiky as usual. The colored shorts that he used to wear had been replaced by dark jeans and he wore a black hoodie.

Kairi gathered her courage and opened the back door. She stepped through it and walked towards Sora. As he looked up she realized with a shock that Roxas had meant what he had said. His skin was an ill-looking shade of pale, but what stroke Kairi most was that the brightness in his beautiful blue eyes was gone. They were hollow, with dark circles underneath.

...

Sora looked up when he heard the backdoor open, expecting it to be Roxas. His heart almost skipped a beat when he realized it was Kairi. He knew that she had moved back, Roxas had told him as soon as he had found out, but what was she doing here? Even though it had taken him a long time to take the hints, she had made it really clear that she didn't want anything to do with him anymore by ignoring him completely.

Sora stared at Kairi and took in the sight of her, all woman-like and beautiful. She was no longer a little girl anymore. Her hair had grown and was now a darker shade of red, she'd grown a bit taller and her features had changed into those of a young woman.

'What are you doing here?' he managed to bring out. Kairi gave him a confused look. 'I moved back,' she said. 'I know that. But what are you doing here?' Sora replied, putting emphasis on the 'here'. His hands were nervously turning the tuning pegs of his guitar, but he quickly let go of them when he heard one of the strings break because he had put too much pressure on it.

'I came here to..' Kairi began but stopped talking when Sora gave her a hurt look. 'Please just leave. I get it. You came here to tell me what you have already made very clear by not answering any of my emails. You don't want anything to do with me anymore. I get it. So please go,' he said. His voice had gotten higher, which always happened when he was upset. Sora wasn't able to look at Kairi anymore, so he stared at his own hands instead, swallowing hard because of a limp in his throat. He didn't want her to see how horrible he felt.

Sora heard footsteps in the grass, then a closing door and he realized that Kairi was gone. As he looked up and stared at the door he blinked hard to stop his upwelling tears. Seeing her leave broke his heart all over again. It killed him that she hated him so much that she didn't want to have anything to do with him, but he still loved her with all his heart and he knew he always would. But how was he supposed to live with this feeling? He felt like a hole had been punched through his chest. A hole which only she could fill.

...

Kairi quickly walked out of the house. She closed the door softly behind her so that she wouldn't alarm Roxas and then she started running towards her house. Sora had looked like a lost puppy, and she knew it was all her fault.

When she had reached her house, Kairi stopped. She put her hands on her knees, breathing heavily. Before she knew it there were tears running down her cheeks. Why hadn't she just kept in contact with him? Then they might have had the reunion she had fantasized about so often. If she had kept in contact with him he might have given her a hug just now instead of telling her to leave.

Kairi wiped her tears away and took a deep breath to calm herself down. She got a hold of her keys and opened the door as quietly as possible. She didn't want to talk to anyone right now, especially not her parents. As soon as she was safe in her room with the door closed she collapsed on her bed and dialed Namine's number on her mobile phone, who immediately picked up. 'Kairi, how did it go?'

Kairi noticed the worried tone in her friend's voice. 'Not well,' she said, biting her lip to fight the tears. 'He told me to leave. He thinks I don't want anything to do with him anymore,' she continued. Her voice was now a mere whisper. Namine sighed on the other side of the phone. 'I know that he is still in love with me. Why else would he still be dwelling like that? But you didn't only hurt his feelings, but also his pride. He's still a guy, Kairi, and it's not the first time a guy's pride comes between things. But you love him too, right? So whatever you do, don't give up. Just keep trying and be patient. It might take some time, but I'm sure he'll realize soon enough that you don't hate him at all,' Namine spoke wisely. Kairi nodded, but she realized that Namine couldn't see her gesture. 'Thanks Namine,' she then spoke. 'Take care. I'll see you tomorrow,' Namine said before she hung up.

Kairi put her mobile phone down and looked at all the unpacked boxes on the ground. She hauled herself up with sigh and started unpacking.

...

Roxas looked up when Sora walked into his room and sat down on his bed. He had been working on his summer homework, but it wasn't very often anymore that Sora came into his room so he immediately closed his notebook and turned his chair so that he faced his broter

'Kairi just came over to visit you, I think,' Sora mumbled. Roxas looked at him with a surprised expression and started shaking his head. 'No, she was here to talk to you. Wasn't she with you in the garden?' he asked confused. 'Yes, she was. But I already knew that she was going to tell me that she didn't want anything to do with me, so I told her to leave.' Roxas suddenly understood where his brother was going with this and he gave Sora an angry look. 'You've got this all wrong! She wasn't here to tell you that! She was here to apologize and to make things right. Damn it Sora, are you that blind? She never hated you, she was in love with you and she still is! That's why she never contacted you, because she was heartbroken. You've got this all mixed up, dude,' Roxas said. He had gotten to his feet and was now shaking Sora's shoulders.

When he saw the look on Sora's face he immediately regretted saying the truth out loud. Sora had gotten to his feet too and angrily slapped Roxas' hands away. 'What kind of person does such a thing when they're in love with someone?' he replied with a raised voice.

Roxas looked at his brother's frustrated face and said nothing. Whatever he would say now would make his younger brother even more upset. Sora realized that Roxas wasn't going to say anything anymore and he turned around. 'Just leave me alone,' he growled and walked out of Roxas' room.

Roxas sat back down with a deep sigh. He hated seeing Sora like this, and all he wanted was for his brother to be happy, but he wasn't the one who could do that, Kairi was.

...

**_Any comments, questions or critiscm?_**


	3. Chapter 3

**Blame It On Me**

**Chapter 3**

'_I spent a long time without you. I'm still doing everything I can just to not think about you.'_

– **Entertain The Pain, My Favorite Highway**

Sora stretched his arms and yawned loudly. He was sitting cross legged on the couch in the living room and was looking at some old pictures. He sighed when he noticed a picture of him and Kairi on the beach. It was probably taken about 3 years ago by Riku. Kairi was looking straight into the camera with a big smile spread across her face. He, on the other hand, was not paying any attention to the camera, but was glancing at Kairi with a genuine smile.

With a little hesitation Sora ripped the photo into two and the pieces them in the bin. He didn't want to be reminded of the person he was back then, because he knew he couldn't be that person anymore.

Sora jumped when he suddenly saw Roxas stand in front him and he eyed him suspiciously. 'Don't creep up on me like that, will you?' he said. Roxas shrugged. 'So you're off to the beach then?' Sora then asked and looked at the ball tucked under Roxas arm.

'Yes. You can still come along if you want?' Roxas asked. He sighed when he saw Sora shake his head. 'Suit yourself, I'll see you later,' he said and walked out the door.

Sora waited until Roxas was gone and then walked to the bin. He fished out the photo he had just ripped apart and put it back together with a piece of tape. He was not ready to let go of it. Not yet.

Ever since her visit the night before, he hadn't been able to get Kairi out of his mind. Because of that, and his fight with Roxas, he was now doubting if her motives for ignoring him were what Sora had assumed they were. Maybe she had a really good reason for the things she had, or better said, not done.

A slight feeling of hope had settled itself in his stomach, and he was trying not to cling onto it too hard, but it made him feel a bit better nonetheless. When school started again things would probably be taking an upwards swing. He knew once he could busy himself with school, he didn't have all the time of the world to think about what happened. He needed routine, and he needed it badly before things would take a downwards swing again. He was tired of being depressed. He wanted to be happy, but he couldn't be. Was he asking for too much?

…

Kairi took off her flip-flops and dug her feet into the warm sand. She glanced around to see if she saw anyone she knew. Namine hadn't said where exactly on the beach they would be, and Kairi now felt a little bit lost. She started walking in a random direction because it was the only thing she could think of, but quickly turned around when she heard someone call her name. Selphie was waving at her, while jumping and down excitedly.

Kairi smiled and walked towards the small group of people she recognized as her friends. She was immediately pulled into a hug as soon as she reached the group. 'Long time no see,' he said as he let her go again and give her his trademark smirk. 'It is so unlike you to hug someone, Riku,' Kairi said in a teasing voice. A bit too late she realized that Tidus tried to grab her. He caught her in a headlock and started to mess up her hair. When he released her she was embraced by Selphie, and Axel send her a warm smile. After their short welcome they all returned to what they were doing.

Kairi pulled a beach towel out of her bag and put it down beside Namine. She smiled, but then realized that Namine was paying attention to Roxas. 'Are you okay?' she asked concerned. Namine looked up and nodded. 'I'm fine. I should be asking you that,' she said and Kairi knew that she was talking about what happened last night. 'I'm okay. A bit sad because of this whole situation, but I'd rather not think about it right now,' she replied and Namine nodded in acknowledgement. 'Don't hate me for asking,' Kairi continued, 'but is there something going on between you and Roxas?'

Namine's check turned red and she started to look around awkwardly. 'Not really. Well, kind of,' she stuttered, then took a deep breath. 'I don't know, to be honest. We're hanging out very often and he flirts with me a lot, but there are mixed signs,' she explained, biting her lip. Kairi frowned in confusion. 'Like what?'

Namine glanced at Roxas again, who was caught up in the football game he was playing with Tidus, Riku and Axel. 'Sometimes he's really sweet, and then I feel like he really likes me, but another time he is really quiet and almost doesn't say anything. I think Sora's depressing state is affecting his own behavior too. He wants to take care of Sora so badly that he forgets about himself very often.

Kairi looked at Namine. She looked pretty beaten up about it, even though she said she was fine. She had always had a bit of thing for Roxas, but he always saw her as a friend. At least he had surpassed that state, but Kairi couldn't help but feel that it was a bit her fault that Roxas and Namine weren't dating properly. It was after all her mistake that had gotten Sora in such a state. And now it turned out that she had hurt Roxas indirectly too. Kairi decided that she would talk to Roxas later and ask what was going on.

She was about to say something reassuring to Namine when Selphie sat down beside them, and she shut her mouth again.

'I'm not interrupting anything?' she asked, but continued immediately when Kairi and Namine both shook their heads. 'Great. So are you two already looking forward to school?'

'School?' Kairi repeated, blinking with her eyes. With everything that was going on she had completely forgotten that school started again in 3 days. Selphie giggled. 'You forgot, didn't you? I can't wait for some reason. The summer vacation has been long enough in my opinion,' she said. Namine nodded in agreement.

Kairi sighed. She didn't really feel like going back to school, because the summer vacation had been too short for her, mainly because they had moved. If it was up to her, the vacation would last for another three weeks.

'I can't believe that you're both looking forward to school,' she said with a disapproving voice. Namine smiled at her. 'Think of the bright sight. You'll be seeing Sora everyday and it'll be a lot easier to convince him your reasons then,' she said. Kairi shot her a doubting look, but maybe Namine was right. Maybe if school started again, everything would get easier. Though she was probably only fooling herself by thinking this.

...

**_Sorry for this short chapter, I promise the next ones will be longer, and will contain more SoKai :)_**

**_Any comments, questions or critiscm?_**


	4. Chapter 4

**Blame It On Me**

**Chapter 4**

'_To believe it's getting better, you can blame it on me'_

– **Blame It On Me, Parachute**

Kairi ran down the stairs with incredible speed and almost stumbled over her grey cat. 'I'm sorry boy, I'm in a hurry' she mumbled, as the cat looked at her accusingly. Kairi stepped into the kitchen. Her parents were sitting at the kitchen table, calmly drinking coffee and reading the paper. She paid no attention to them and put her lunchbox in her bag.

'In a hurry again, Kairi?' her father, the mayor asked in a teasing voice and Kairi shot him an angry glare. 'You always are, but I get it. You don't want to keep Sora waiting, right? How is he anyway, I haven't seen him here yet?' he continued.

Kairi bit her lip. Her parents had no idea what was going on between her and Sora, and apparently they thought she would still be walking to school with him every morning. Even the thought of that made her sad.

'He's fine. He's been busy, that's why he hasn't stopped by,' she replied quickly, trying to hide the emotion in her voice, and walked out of the kitchen again. She sat down at the foot of the stairs and rubbed her eyes, trying to restrain herself from crying. She stared at the clock and got up again. If she wouldn't leave now she would probably be late, and that wouldn't be a good start for a first day of school.

Armed with an umbrella she stepped outside to defy the bad weather, and the start of an awful day.

…

'Roxas, please tell me I can catch a ride with you?' Sora asked desperately, eying the never-ending rain outside. Roxas grinned at his brother. 'Don't youthink you should do something else first?' he asked doubtfully. Sora was still dressed in his boxer shorts, while Roxas himself was already fully dressed. His grin grew wider when Sora gave him a confused look. 'You are really too oblivious. I don't think anyone will appreciate it when you get to school dressed like this. And I'm definitely not going to walk at your side, you'll make a complete fool out of both of us.'

Sora now got the hint and hurried upstairs to put on some decent clothing. Without wasting a second he put on some jeans and a purple shirt. Then he combed his fingers through his hair in an attempt to tame his spiky hair, but without succeeding.

When he came downstairs again Roxas gave him thumbs up. 'Now that'll really impress the girls, though I don't think you care about that?' Roxas asked doubtfully. Sora shook his head, swinging his bag over one shoulder.

'Can we just go?,' he asked, his voice suddenly very grumpy. Roxas shot him an annoyed look. 'Don't be like that Sora. You know I want the best thing for you, but you can't keep on shutting everything and everyone out. Everything I say annoys you!' he said, blocking the door as Sora tried to push past him.

'Oh great, let's have another argument, like we don't have enough of those to color our lives already. I never asked for you to be concerned about me, I can take care of myself just fine. Now move!' Sora replied with an icy tone, but Roxas didn't move an inch. 'Come on, we both know that you're not fine. I know how heartbroken you really are, even though you try to act like it doesn't affect you at all. You might not need my advice, but I'll give you one last one. You should either talk things out with Kairi, or move on with your life and forget about her,' he said, and stepped aside to let Sora through, but he didn't move. He was looking at Roxas quietly. 'I will,' he said softly after what seemed like forever, then stepped outside and hurried towards Roxas car, followed closely by a perplexed Roxas.

…

Kairi tucked her hair behind her ear and quickened her pace. Why on earth would it be raining today, of all days? She was walking towards school, hidden under a pink umbrella, her bag slung over one shoulder. The nervous feeling that had settled itself in the pit of her stomach grew with every step she took. She hadn't slept well ever since her encounter with Sora, and when she did she had endless nightmares about him. When she tried to call him, he didn't pick up, and when she send him text messages he didn't reply. All in all things hadn't improved a bit between them, but Kairi couldn't blame Sora for ignoring her. She was the one who hadn't answer him in the first place, so she understood that it was now too little too late for her to finally talk to him again. But she wouldn't give up. She wanted to at least tell him why she had made her decision, because clearly he was thinking the wrong thing. What happened after that she would see, but she didn't want a misunderstanding between them.

When she spotted the school building, Kairi hurried in for shelter. She shook the raindrops from her umbrella and put it in her locker together with her slightly wet coat. Then she glanced around her to see if Sora was somewhere in the sea of students. She spotted him near the end of the hallway, where he was shoving books in his locker.

With a determined look on her face Kairi went up to him, but all her determination disappeared when she saw the angry look on his face that appeared at the sight of her. Sora closed his locker and turned around to walk away without a word, but Kairi got a hold of his wrist and firmly closed her hand around it, holding him back. Sora didn't turn around, but just stood with his back turned towards Kairi, waiting for her to let go of his wrist so that he could get away. His lips were tightly pressed together

'Please don't ignore me,' Kairi mumbled. She let out a small gasp as Sora turned his head around with a jerk and stared at her. 'Now you know what it feels like to be ignored,' he hissed. 'I waited one and a half year with anticipation for you to write me back. For one and a half year I kept making excuses for you why you wouldn't write me, why I didn't hear a single word for you. Untill finally I realized that you had banned me out of your life. Do you know what that felt like?'

Sora's voice was no longer a mere hiss, he was now yelling at her, and various people were looking at them. Kairi was taken aback by Sora's sudden burst out and had let go off his wrist. 'You had more than enough time to talk to me. It's too late now, so just leave me alone,' he said and walked away.

Kairi watched him leave without doing anything. She could feel tears well up in her eyes, for the second time this morning. Until now she had never encountered an angry Sora. She knew that he sometimes got angry, though it merely happened, but he had always been cheerful around. He had never gotten angry at her. And now he was.

'Kairi, are you alright?' She looked around and stood face to face with Namine, who was eyeing her with a worried look. Kairi shook her head. 'You saw it, right? I don't know what to do anymore, Namine. He doesn't want to listen to me. He hates me,' she mumbled, staring at her feet. She lifter her head when she felt Namine's hand on her face and let her wipe away her tears.

'He doesn't hate you, that much I'm sure of. In fact, I think he's making progress,' Namine said. She smiled reassuring when she saw Kairi's confusing. 'You know how sadness often comes in 5 stages? First there's denial, then anger, followed up by sadness, admittal and forgiveness. In Sora's case the sadness came first, and then the anger, but presumably it's the same thing,' she explained. Kairi looked at her doubtingly. 'Do you really think so?' she asked.

'Roxas tells me about Sora a lot. So yes, I do. From what I've heard he has been locking up these feelings of sadness for a long time now. It had to come out sooner or later. Apparently that time is now.'

Kairi's face lid up a bit. 'Thanks Namine, you always know how to keep me going,' she said softly. She sighed at the sound of the bell. 'I'll see you in the lunch break then, after I've talked to Sora.'

…

Sora was sitting on the highest row of the school tribune and was looking out over the sport fields. He often came here in his lunch break when he needed to think. Like now.

Never in his entire life had he felt this angry before. That morning, when Kairi talked to him, he felt like he wanted to slap her in the face, to hurt her in some way, and it frightened him. He wasn't a violent person, that much he was sure of, so why was he feeling like this?

Sora gasped when he felt a hand on his shoulder. He looked up to find that Kairi was sitting behind him, and the anger in him was immediately there again. She probably noticed it too, because she immediately let go of his shoulder. He immediately got up and started to walk away, but something in the tone of her voice made him stop in his tracks. 'Please just hear me out.'

When he didn't speak, nor moved, she continued.

'I.. I can understand if you still don't want to speak to me after this, but I just want to tell you the truth.. It was never my intention to hurt you in any way. And honestly, if I knew that I was causing you so much hurt, I would've done something. But Sora, I never 'ignored you', as you call it, because I didn't want anything to do with you anymore. Leaving Destiny Islands, leaving you was the hardest I've ever done. And at first I believed that I would just return as often as possible. But I soon realized that the distance was too big, and that my parents wouldn't let me. So I did what seemed to be the most sensible thing at the time. I tried to forget about you, because the memory of you caused me pain. I ignored your letters, your emails and all your other attempts because I am a selfish person. Because I didn't want to feel pain,' she stuttered, her words coming out in a blur and hitting him like a punch in the stomach. She was pausing, thinking of the right words, and he took the opportunity to sit down on one of the tribune benches. His legs had suddenly become very wobbly.

'But it never got easier, to be honest. I'm so sorry Sora. I'd give do anything just to turn back time and do things differently,' Kairi said and looked at him with a desperate look. Sora stared at her, not knowing what to do. All his anger had washed away, but had been replaced by confusion. He had no clue whatsoever what was going to happen now, though he knew that it was up to him.

'I need some time to think,' Sora suddenly said and stood up abruptly. He shook his head in bewilderment, but of course his thinking didn't get clearer because of that. Without saying another thing he hurried of the tribune and ran off in a random direction.

...

**_Next chapter will be up very soon after this one ^^_**

**_Any comments, questions or critiscm?_**


	5. Chapter 5

**Blame It On Me**

**Chapter 5**

'_Just when I feel my breath is running out, the earth moves and you find me.'_

– **Rescue, Seabird**

'Hey, are you okay?' Riku asked and looked at Kairi with concerned eyes. They were sitting in the cafeteria of school together with Namine, Roxas and Selphie, eating their lunches. Though Kairi wasn't exactly eating, she had been poking around in her salad with a fork. She pushed her salad away from her and met Riku's eyes. She knew that her face was very pale and that she had dark circles under her eyes.

'Is it because of-,' Riku asked, but Kairi interrupted him. 'No, it has nothing do with him. I just couldn't sleep last night, so I'm tired,' she mumbled.

'You should eat something, I'm sure that'll give you some energy,' Namine said helpfully, but Kairi just shook her head. 'I'm not really feeling like eating. I'm afraid it will come out again..'

Roxas grinned when Selphie pulled a horrified face. 'Okay, that is enough information Kairi,' he said quickly before Selphie was able to blurt out something rude. He then looked around the cafeteria to see if his brother was somewhere in the crowd.

'Has anyone seen Sora?' he asked to no one in particular. Riku shrugged. 'He's probably outside with Tidus,' he suggested before taking a large bite of his sandwich.

'How is he anyway?' Selphie asked with a curious tone. 'Oh, he's fine,' Roxas replied. Kairi looked at him inquiringly. He seemed to mean it.

Kairi stood up, grabbed her box of salad and put it in her bag. She made a mental note that she would eat it later that day, or otherwise she would starve herself. 'Hey guys, I'm going out for a bit, maybe that'll make me feel better,' she said and walked out the cafeteria without waiting for a reply.

She stopped when she noticed that Roxas was coming after her, and they walked out of the cafeteria together. When they reached a fairly empty hallway Roxas stopped.

'Did you manage to get through Sora?' he asked. Kairi looked up in amazement. 'Not exactly? I told the truth, but I haven't spoken to him ever since. I'm waiting for him to decide what he wants,' she explained. 'Why do you ask?'

Roxas smiled at Kairi. 'He's been silent the past few days, but in a good way. I guess he's thinking everything out carefully, though I believe he has made up his mind a long time ago, he is just slow in realizing it.'

Kairi tilted her head and gave Roxas an insecure look. 'Good or bad?' she mumbled, afraid to hear the answer. Roxas put his hands on her shoulders and gave her a reassuring look. 'I'm sure he'll make the right decision.' he said and Kairi's face lit up in a smile.

'So Roxas, since you're meddling with your brother's and mine business, I have the right to meddle with your business too,' she suddenly said, and she quickly continued when Roxas gave her a dull look. 'What is going on between you and Namine?'

Roxas almost choked and his cheeks turned a shade of red that Kairi's hair would certainly envy. 'What are you talking about?' he blurted out. Kairi sniffed and hit him on the head. 'Don't act like you know nothing of it. Just answer the question,' she said sternly, in a voice that wouldn't take no as an answer.

Roxas raised his shoulders. 'I don't know,' he mumbled, not meeting Kairi's eyes. A protesting sound left his mouth when she raised her hand to hit him again, but instead she let out a deep sigh.

'You've been way too concerned about Sora, and now your own business is a much lower priority than his well-being. Am I right?' she asked softly. When he nodded hesitatingly she continued. 'Sora is in my hands now. Well, he just has to realize it, but he'll be fine. You should start figuring your own business out. Don't forget about yourself.'

Roxas looked at Kairi and bit her lip. 'But I just told you. I don't know what I want.'

She giving him an encouraging smile. 'Sure you do. You just need to realize it. I guess it runs in the family, that slow understanding,' she said and then turned around to walk away convinced that he'd realize what was important to him besides Sora soon enough.

…

Sora pulled the hood of his jacket over his head and stepped into the pouring rain. He crossed the parking lot of the school and started walking home. This was definitely not his lucky day. Normally he would be driving home with Roxas, but on Wednesdays Roxas was always off a period earlier than Sora. He had no other choice but to walk home.

He dug his hands deep in the pockets of his jacket and bowed his head to keep the rain from blowing in his face.

Sora was lost in thoughts, and just in time noticed something that was before his feet before he stepped on it. It took him a few seconds before he realized that it was Kairi and a feeling of panic rushed over him. He quickly kneeled down beside her and started to shake her shoulders gently.

'Kairi, wake up!' he said in a soft but insistent voice, but she didn't reply, and her eyes stayed closed.

He quickly realized that she was not going to wake up. Without any hesitation Sora lifted Kairi in his arms and started to walk towards his house as quickly as he could without letting her fall.

When Roxas opened the door, Sora walked in without a word and gently laid Kairi down on the couch in the living room.

'What is going on, what has happened to her?' Roxas asked worriedly. Sora put his hand on Kairi's forehead. She was burning with fever, even though she was shivering. 'I don't know, I found her like this on the street, but she has a fever. Can you grab a blanket for me?' he asked, and Roxas hurried up the stairs. Sora looked at Kairi and bit his lip. She looked so fragile. Maybe he should've taken her to her own house instead of his, but his house has been closer.

Roxas came into the living room again with a blanket in his hands. 'Get her to sit upright,' he ordered. As Sora did so he wrapped the blanket around Kairi, and then Sora gently laid her down again.

'I'll call her parents, you stay here with her.' Sora nodded and sat down on the arm of the couch. His hand stroke through Kairi's red locks absent mindedly , but he stopped immediately when her eyes flicked open.

'Where am I?' she whispered. When she noticed Sora she quickly hauled herself upwards. She firmly pressed her hand against her head and let out a groan of pain.

'You're at our house Kairi. I found you passed out on the street in the rain so I took you here. I think you do not only have a bad cold, but also a concussion since you probably fell,' Sora said. 'Roxas is calling your parents right now, so don't worry. You're going to okay,' He gave her a reassuring smile.

Kairi wrapped the blanket more tightly around herself, still shivering. 'Are you cold?' Sora asked as he got up. He sat down next to her when she nodded and hesitatingly wrapped his arms around her. He tightened his grip when she snuggled closer and couldn't help but smile when she closed her eyes and leaned against his chest. He had missed this.

…

Roxas had just hang up the phone after he had spoken to Kairi's mother, and was now dialing Namine's number.

'Hey Nami, it's Roxas,' he said. He could hear the girl sigh on the other side of the phone. 'Roxas, where are you? I thought we agreed to meet half an hour ago?' she asked confused, with a bit of accusation in her voice. Roxas felt bad for her. It happened very often that he came late when they agreed to meet, and sometimes he didn't come at all, and Namine was probably getting very tired of it. She never complained about it, being the sweet girl she was, but he could tell that it was bothering her. He didn't know why it happened, but other stuff always came up.

'I'm really sorry, but something happened. Kairi's here, and she's really ill, so we're going to bring her home first. I promise I'll be there, just a bit later,' he said. A 'bit later' was to put it softly. He knew that by the time he had finally reached Namine's house, it would probably already be one and a half hour later than the original time that they had agreed on.

'I knew she was not feeling well during school but I didn't know it was that bad!' Namine exclaimed. 'Is she going to be okay? What happened? And why is she at your place?' she asked with a worried tone. Roxas was watching Sora and Kairi from the kitchen. She seemed to be sleeping in Sora's arms.

'No, me neither, but I guess we were both wrong. Sora found her unconscious on the street. She probably passed out because she was ill. I'm sure she'll be okay though,' he said with a reassuring voice. 'We're going to bring her home now, I'll see you soon,' he said and hang up after Namine had also said her goodbye.

Roxas glanced at Sora and Kairi again from the kitchen. Seeing them together like that made him smile. It was obvious that they were made for it each other.

He didn't want to disturb their moment, but Kairi was sick and needed to be taken home. 'Sora, can you carry her to the car?' he asked as he walked into the room. Roxas thought he spotted disappointment in Sora's eyes when he looked up, but he got up anyway and lifted Kairi with the greatest care. Roxas opened the front door for him, and helped him put Kairi in the backseat of his old car. Sora slit in the seat next to her and Roxas got behind the wheel. He took a quick glance in his mirror to see if they were both seated alright and saw that Sora had wrapped his arms around her again to keep her warm. The car started with an explosion of sound and they drove to Kairi's house, while the rain was still pouring outside.

…

'Don't go,' Kairi mumbled. She lay curled up in her bed wrapped in many blankets, though she was still shivering, and looked at Sora with a desperate look in her eyes. Sora stopped and turned around to look at her.

'Please don't go,' she mumbled again and tears welled up in her eyes. She didn't know if she was crying because of the pain she felt in her head, or if it was because of him, but she didn't really care. She just wanted him to stay.

Sora was at the door, and she half expected him to walk out, but instead he closed it and sat down on a chair next to her bed. A smile appeared on his lips 'Don't worry. I'm not going anywhere. I promise,' he said softly. Kairi relaxed a bit and closed her tired eyelids. She could hear him breathe in and out in a regular pace, and she felt his warm breath in her neck.

'Hey Sora?' she asked and watched him raise his head and look at her with a questioning look. 'I'm cold again.'

She had meant for him to get another blanket for her, but instead he sat down on her bed and pulled her close to him. She breathed in his smell, a little surprised by his action, but was happy with it nonetheless. She knew he only did it for her to get well, but just for now she let herself believe it was because of a different reason.

Before she knew it , Kairi was drifting off to sleep. Far away she could feel a hand strike through her hair, but all she wanted to do was sleep now. In Sora's arms she was safe.


	6. Chapter 6

**Blame It On Me**

**Chapter 6**

'_Hello, hello, hello, hello, you got the wrong number. You got the wrong number.'_

– **Hello Hello – Fabian Bunch**

_Kairi's head jolted upwards when she heard her phone ring. With a deep sigh she leaned forward and flipped her cell phone open. She didn't need to check who was calling her, she already knew. It was Sora, like she expected. He had been calling her a lot in the past few days, and she had ignored all his calls. Like she was doing now, firmly pressing the red button. _

_Only few seconds later her phone rang again. Kairi bit her lip in frustration and shoved her phone beneath a few pillows, but the sound was still very loud. Sora's calls infuriated her. She had promised herself to break all contact with him, so that she would be able to get over him, but ignoring him was almost as hard to bear as her broken heart. It made her crazy. She just wanted him to stop, to forget about her so that they could both go on with their lives, because there was no way she could ever go back to Destiny Islands. But Sora seemed determined to keep in contact with her, and she didn't have the courage to tell him that she didn't want to speak to him anymore. So she ignored his constant calls, emails and text messages, hoping that they would stop eventually. _

…

Sora hesitatingly walked up the front porch and peered through the window to see if anybody was home. Which was absolutely unnecessary, because he knew she would be home, where else would she be in her current state?

With a nervous sigh he looked at his own reflection in the glass of the front door and combed his hands through his hair in an attempt to tidy his hair. He wasn't sure if seeing Kairi was the right thing to do. Hell, he didn't even know how he felt about her right now, but visiting her while she was ill seemed the right thing to do. Especially after he had been the one to find and take care of her that day.

It had been three days now. Three long days in which Sora had made several attempts to call Kairi, but every time he had put the phone down immediately. Now finally he had taken up the courage to visit her, though he was very nervous. He was still angry at her for the way she treated him, but he was far more worried about her wellbeing.

Sora knocked loud, but quickly on the door, before he could change his mind. It was almost immediately opened, but the sight that was before his eyes didn't reassure him in the slightest bit. Kairi was leaning against the door, wrapped in a dressing gown and a blanket. She looked worn out, with blank tired eyes and a pale skin. It seemed like she was putting all her weight against the door, and as if she would fall down it wasn't supporting him anymore. She looked even more fragile than when he found her three days ago, and it seemed like these three days of rest hadn't done her any good. In fact, it only seemed to have gotten worse.

Kairi opened the door a bit further and gestured for Sora to come in and go to the living room. He silently walked in and looked around. Surprisingly, everything was still the same before they had moved. Every piece of furniture was in the exact same place, almost like they had never been moved.

'Sora?' Kairi mumbled, and a little surprised he realized that he had been lost in thoughts. She was looking at him expectantly, and he knew that she was wondering why he was here. It was not until now that he realized how sad she looked at him , sucking her bottom lip and almost not daring to look him in the eyes. He had never thought that maybe this whole situation that they had gotten themselves into was also affecting her greatly, and perhaps, he though, it was even the reason why she had gotten so ill in the first place.

'You don't look so good. How have you been?' Sora asked carefully. Kairi bit her lip. 'I am diagnosed with anemia,' she said, her voice just a mere whisper. He wanted to respond, but she kept on talking.'

'So why did you come?' Sora was a bit startled by her direct question. 'I've been thinking a lot these past days, and I've figured something out,' he said nervously. 'None of this is really worth it. I miss your presence, I've been missing it for two years now. I can't deny that I was angry with you for the way you acted, but I guess I've forgiven you. Perhaps I would've done the same thing if I was the one moving away. I want us to be friends again, Kairi. Please.'

…

'You want to be friends again?' Kairi mumbled. She watched as Sora nodded, his eyes full of hope and something she couldn't quite find a word for. She knew she should be happy about his decision, but she felt a sting in her stomach that had nothing to do with her anemia. She wanted tell him how much she loved him, that being friends wasn't enough for her. She wanted more, but of course she wouldn't say that out loud. For now she had to be happy with the progress that they were making, and hope that maybe one day they would be more than just friends.

Kairi then realized that she still hadn't responded to Sora's request, and he was looking at her with widened eyes. He seemed ready to storm off any moment. 'I'm glad,' she said. Sora got on his feet, and for a moment she feared that he would walk off, but instead he pulled her into a tight hug. Kairi let out a surprised gasp. She then stood up and put her arms around him, using him to support her.

For some time they continued to stand there, tightly embracing. Kairi leant back when she felt something wet in her neck and she looked at Sora's face. There were tears running down his cheeks, and he tried to wipe them away quickly, but she had already noticed.

'Sora..' Kairi said softly. He gave her an ashamed look and then lowered his eyes. Kairi gently wiped Sora's tears away. Both of them looked up in surprise when the doorbell rang.

'That must be Namine. She and Roxas promised to step by,' Kairi mumbled and hurried, as quick as she could to the hallway and opened the door. Roxas and Namine were standing in front of her with beaming smiles on their faces, but Kairi could sense that something was not right. Namine's eyes were a bit red and puffy, like she had just cried and Roxas seemed to be a bit awkward, though they both obviously tried to hide it.

Sora came into the hallways and paused at Kairi's side. He too, seemed to be noticing that something was not right.

'Sora, what are you doing here?' Roxas said. Kairi gave a small smile. 'Sora and I talked, and we decided that it was really not worth it,' she explained before Sora could even open his mouth. He nodded in agreement. 'I'm going home now, can't you give me a lift Roxas?' he said and pointed at Roxas' car.

Roxas seemed relieved. 'Okay, let's go,' he said and turned around. Kairi watched as he locked eyes with Namine for a moment, but they both looked down immediately. Kairi waved at the two brothers as they walked to Roxas' car. She then grabbed Namine's arm and pulled her inside.

'What is going on?' she asked, and looked at her best friend. Namine lowered her eyes and just stared at her shoes, refusing to reply.

…

Roxas closed the door behind him and let out a deep sigh. 'Thanks Sora,' he mumbled as he leant forward and put his forehead against the steering wheel.

'Are you going to explain to me what that meant?' Sora asked in a demanding tone. 'I..I don't know what happened. I really don't. It confuses me,' Roxas mumbled, without even lifting his head.

'Namine and I somehow caught into a fight. I really love her, I do, but for some reason I treat her wrongly. I'm always late, never return her calls and when she needs me I'm never there. She's suffering because of my mixed feelings, but I don't know what I can do..' he explained after a short silence. Hearing how desperate his own voice sounded, Roxas felt even more miserable. 'What should I do?'

He lifted his eyes and looked at Sora. 'It's because you're always concerned about me, isn't it?' Sora replied. There was no accusation in his voice, only kindness. Roxas nodded slowly.

'But I'm fine, especially now everything is okay between me and Kairi again. You should focus on your own life Roxas. Apologize to Namine, tell her why you behaved that way, and make sure you take good care of her,' Sora said. Roxas sighed deeply. 'But what if she won't forgive me? I've never seen her so upset before,' he said. First he had made some irritated and mean comment about her, then they started to scream at each other. He had made Namine upset, and guilt was eating at him.

'She loves you, that much I'm sure of, so you to at least try,' Sora said. He gave Roxas a small encouraging squeeze in his shoulder. 'You two will be fine.'

...

**_Sorry for the late update! This chapter contains a bit of Roxas/Namine too (:_**

**_Any comments, questions or critiscm?_**


	7. Chapter 7

**Blame It On Me**

**Chapter 7**

'_'m in love with a girl who knows me better. Fell for the women just when I met her,'_

– **I'm In Love With A Girl, Gavin Degraw**

Roxas was nervously pacing back and forth though an empty corridor. His face was pale, with bloodshot eyes and his body was tense. He knew he looked worse than ever, but sleep hadn't gotten to him in a few days. It was not until now, after they had had their first fight, that he realized how much he truly wished for Namine to be by his side. He had been so damned worried about Sora, trying his hardest to make his brother feel whole again, that he had forgotten about himself. Kairi had been right all along, but he obviously had realized it too late.

It was not like Namine was ignoring him, because he saw her every day, but she no longer met his gaze. When she did look at him for a split second, all he could see was hurt, and even fright, as if she was afraid that he was going to yell at her again.

He rubbed his hands against his faded jeans because they felt so sweaty. She wasn't going to show up, he could feel it.

'Roxas?' Namine's soft voice called from behind him and Roxas immediately turned around. He sighed deeply and took a few steps forward to embrace her but Namine shook her head, and he stopped dead in his tracks.

'Please hear me out?' Roxas said. He was not asking, it was more like demanding. When Namine gave him a small nod he continued.

'I know that I've been an ass Namine. I've totally treated you wrong, and I don't only mean the things I said to you in our fight, I mean all of it. I was so concerned about Sora, and I never realized how you were always there to keep me on my feet. You helped me with everything, and I never once returned the gesture,' Roxas said, talking so fast that it was impossible for Namine to interrupt, and he kept on going. 'I'm not blaming my brother, don't get me wrong, but everything just seemed of no importance compared to his depression. I wanted to make him happy so badly that I lost track of myself and others. Of you. But everything is clear to me now.' He stopped talking for a moment to breathe in.

'The person who's most special to you, it's not me,' Namine said softly. 'I'm not your light. Sora is your light in the darkness, can't you see?' She looked at him desperately, tears welling up in her eyes. Roxas shook his head in bewilderment. He took a few steps forward, and when she didn't move, he hesitatingly cupped her face in his hands. 'He's important to me, yes. But you're my light, Namine. You've always been my light, I just never realized it. But I do now,' he whispered and now dared to look straight in her eyes. Salty tears were running down her cheeks which he softly wiped away with his thumbs. 'I love you.'

Namine's eyes grew wider, and she was unable to speak, but Roxas could tell that she believed him. He slowly leaned forward and their lips gently brushed, before he took a step backwards to observe her face. She then suddenly threw her arms around him, and half-crashed into his body. Roxas stumbled backwards, quickly wrapping his arms around Namine's slender waist. The moment his back hit the wall, their lips met again, sharing a loving kiss.

…

'Guess what?' Selphie yelled as she half ran, half stumbled towards the table they were all sitting at. Tidus was closely behind her, just in time grasping her by her arm before she crashed into the table.

Sora raised his eyes and gave the two excited teens before him a questioning look. He was sitting next to Kairi and for the last 10 minutes he had been competing with Riku for her attention. He glanced at her from the corner of his eyes, but she seemed to be all eyes and ears to Selphie and Tidus, so he averted his attention to them again.

'Go on then, what is it?' Riku said, not even bothering to hide how annoyed he was by the brown haired girl.

'Yuna is hosting a Christmas party on the day before Christmas. She, Rikku and Paine will be taking care of everything, the booze, the music, the food, all we have to do is show in a chrismas-like outfit. It'll be loads of fun, so we're going right?' Selphie said. Sora couldn't help but be a little amazed by this statement. Less than a year ago Yuna had been a quiet, shy girl who had been barely capable of talking to people. When Tidus started to hang out with her she had gradually become a different person. 'I'm guessing it was your idea to go?' he asked Tidus. The blond simply grinned at him, but Sora already knew enough. He turned his head towards Kairi when she softly put a hand on his elbow. Even the with slightest touch Sora could feel a warm feeling in the pit of his stomach. He craved for her so badly, but made sure she didn't know about it.

'It does sound like a lot of fun,' Kairi said. Selphie made a pleased sound, and while clapping her hands together she said: 'That settles it then.' With that being said there was no turning back for all of them.

…

'Sora, move over a bit,' Kairi said as she pushed against the boy's shoulder. Sora raised his eyes in a questioning look, then he hailed his body from her bed into a sitting position with his back against the wall. Kairi let herself fall forward on her stomach with a deep sigh. Ever since she had started going to school again after her fall, Sora had walked her home, and now they were doing their homework together everday.

'You're tired, aren't you?' Sora asked. Kairi looked into his concerned eyes, feeling her heart flutter a little. 'If I say yes, then you'll get up and leave, so no,' she said and smiled at the sound of Sora's chuckle.

'I have to leave sooner or later anyway. Besides, if you're tired then who am I to keep you from resting?' he responded and was already attempting to get up, but Kairi quickly pushed him back against the wall.

'Just a little longer,' she murmured. She could feel his hot breath in her face and it was not until then that she realized that her face was only inches away from his. He was looking at her with confused widened eyes. Kairi quickly stumbled backwards to the farthest edge of the bed and averted her gaze to her books, so that she didn't have to look at him

'I really better be going,' Sora said and she tell that he had gotten off the bed because of the sound the wood was making. His bare feet sounded soft and familiar on the wooden ground, and when they stopped at the door Kairi finally dared to raise her eyes.

'That party Selphie was talking about.. Let's go together,' he said softly and looked at her expectantly. Kairi couldn't help but smile.

'Sure, as friends right?' she asked. 'Yeah.. as friends..'

...

**_Any comments, questions or critiscm?_**


	8. Chapter 8

**Blame It On Me**

**Chapter 8**

'_Steal a kiss in the moment. You and me, everything that could be'_

– **Obvious, Hey Monday**

Sora impatiently leaned against the front door with his cell phone pressed to his ear. Roxas car was parked across the street, and he and Namine were looking at him through the window.

'Hello?' Kairi's voice suddenly called in his ear and a smile lit Sora's face by the sound of her voice. 'You're late, you know,' he said in a-matter-of-fact-voice. From the other side of the phone he could hear her stumble over something, and then curse. 'Kairi?'

'I'm terribly sorry. But the front door is open, so you can come on in,' she repeated and before he could reply she had already hung up on him. Sora sighed, trusting his cell phone deep in the pocket of his jeans, then he crossed the street. Roxas immediately opened the window when he saw Sora coming.

'I don't think she's ready yet. It'll probably take her a while from the sounds of it, so two can go ahead and fun, I don't mind,' he said. Namine tilted her head. 'It's so like her to be late,' she said with a giggle, then she looked outside with a frown. 'Will you two be alright in the snow?'

Sora raised his shoulders: 'We'll be fine. I'll see you guys at the pary,' he said and waved. 'You're sure?' Roxas aked. When he nodded firmly he closed the window and started the car.

As soon as they were out of sight Sora walked towards Kairi's house again, and without any hesitation opened the front door, carefully closing it behind him.

'Hey Sora, is that you?' Kairi called from above. Sora couldn't help but laugh because she sounded so stressed. She was obviously far from ready, which he had already suspected. He quietly walked up the stairs, and entered her room. She was standing in front of her closet with a hair dryer in her hand. Her crimson hair was wet from showering, and she was still in her bathing robe.

Kairi then turned around and a scream escaped her mouth when she suddenly spotted someone behind her. She stumbled backwards clenching her robe tightly, and only after she realized that it was Sora did she breath out.

'You scared the hell out of me,' she said as she sat down on her bed. Sora grinned, rubbing his hand through his spiky hair. 'You should hurry up, the party has probably already started.'

Kairi got up again and pushed Sora out of her room, firmly closing the door behind her. 'I'm not the type of guy to peek, you big meanie,' he said and then chuckled. 'Shut up,' was her only response.

15 minutes later Kairi was finally done. She checked herself one last time in the mirror, then she opened the door and walked into the hallway. 'How do I look?' she asked

Sora was staring at her with widened eyes. She shifted a little uncomfortably, and coughed, but he still didn't respond. 'Sora?' she asked a little unsure. He shook his head in bewilderment and then opened his mouth. 'You look ho..- amazing,' he said, eyeing her.

Kairi had chosen for a female santa outfit in the form of a red dress with white fur. The dress was just above her knees with a black belt above her hips, and showed a little bit of cleavage. Beneath the dress she wore black boots with laces. She had carefully chosen her outfit together with Namine, with Sora in her mind.

She smiled at him. 'Thanks, you look good too,' she responded, looking at his dark jeans, long sleeved red shirt and the red Christmas hat he was wearing over his caramel tresses. He was still staring at her, and his eyes burned through her skin, but she choose to ignore it.

'Shall we go then?' she asked and Sora finally leapt to his feet. 'I told Roxas and Namine to go ahead, so we'll have to walk, but it's a short distance from your house to Yuna's,' he said as he walked down the stairs after her. 'There's a lot of snow though,' he said, eyeing the high heels of her boots. 'Will you manage on those?'

'I'll be fine,' Kairi said, but the moment she stepped outside, she landed on her bum because it was so slippery. Sora tried to hold his laughter, but a chuckle escaped his mouth. Kairi turned her head to look at him. Her cheeks were bright red, and she was giving him a look that made him catch his breath. He immediately hurried forward and helped her up.

'You're so stubborn,' Sora said with a sigh and wiped the snow of her clothes. He then linked his arm through hers and they started walking towards Yuna's house.

…

'It's so crowded!' Kairi breathed. She glanced over her shoulder at Sora, who was staring at the crowd before them.

'I can't believe Yuna is the brain behind all this,' Sora said as he shook of his jacket and dropped it somewhere in a corner together with her's. The hallway was filled with coats, bags and what not, and in the living room before their eyes there were people everywhere.

Kairi suddenly felt Sora's warm hand close around her own hand, and before she knew it he was dragging her along through the massive amount of people. She spotted Tidus and Yuna making out on a couch, and somewhere to her right Selphie was dancing on a table in a drunken state, but that was about all she spotted of her friends. Namine and Roxas were nowhere to be soon, and she didn't see Riku either.

Sora then stopped at what presumably functioned as a bar; a table in the door opening of the kitchen, where Rikku and Paine were handing out drinks. They handed her and Sora a drink, and as soon as they did they were pushed aside by Wakka, who was obviously very drunk.

'Hey buddy, how are you doing?' Sora asked with a grin, and while Wakka tried to come up with a sensible answer he grabbed Kairi's hand and dragged her onto the dancefloor.

Kairi emptied her glass in one shot and put it on a table nearby. When Sora had done the same she moved closer to him until their hips were almost bumping, and started to move on the beat of the music.

…

They kept on dancing for a long time and took shots every time Rikku passed them with the small drinks. Kairi had lost track of how many shots she had taken, but she was feeling light headed and happy so she didn't really mind.

The alcohol made her do things she normally wouldn't even dare, and she was now dragging Sora into the empty hallway where she firmly pushed him against the wall. Their bodies touched and Sora wrapped his arms around her. His breath was hot on her face, but she didn't turn away like she had a few days ago.

'Sora, I've missed you terribly when I was away' Kairi whispered, and gazed into his radiant blue eyes. 'I've missed you too,' Sora said. He was stroking her hand with his thumb and Kairi felt like they were the only two people in the house. She knew that somewhere out there, a lot of people were dancing and drinking, but right now she felt like it was just her and Sora.

'Kairi, can I kiss you?' Sora said softly and she watched as his head drew closer to hers when she gave a small nod. Her heart was fluttering in her chest, like a butterfly, and all she could think of was this moment, here and now. Kairi moved her head towards Sora's, and she closed her eyes.

Then their lips brushed softly and she tasted a mix of alcohol and peppermint, but to her it was like the sweetest thing on the earth, though they weren't kissing.

Sora let out a gasp, and Kairi opened her eyes in surprise when he jerked back his head before they could actually kiss. She quickly realized why, because she could hear Riku call their names. Because they were standing in the shadows next to the door he hadn't spotted them yet. Kairi gave Sora a desperate look and drew her fingers to her lips, but he shook his head and stepped out of the dark. With that, their small moment of intimacy ended because Riku was now walking towards them with a grin on his face.

'There you two are, I've been looking forever for you!' he said. Kairi felt akward and disappointed, and she didn't feel like talking to Riku so she pushed past him and ran through the hallway into the crowd. He had ruined it for them.

...

**_Merry Christmas everybody! I know it's a few days early, but I wanted to upload this very badly, haha. _**

**_This is dedicated to TheRealJuKo, because you're such a great supporter of mine. You've been really friendly and supportive, so this chapter if for you ^^_**


	9. Chapter 9

**Blame It On Me**

**Chapter 9**

' _But it was not your fault but mine. And it was your heart on the line'_

– **Little Lion Man, Mumford and Sons**

'_I really can't believe that our time is up,' Kairi whispered. She and Sora were just a few inches away from each other, her head inches away from his ear, because she did not want the others to hear what she was saying. She turned her head for a moment, but Roxas and Namine weren't paying any attention to her and Sora. Selphie, Tidus and Axel were in the middle of a discussion, and Riku was staring into the distance._

'_Don't worry, I'll call you everyday, and we'll see each other again when you come over in the summer vacation,' Sora said. Kairi glanced at his smiling face and tears welled up in her eyes. _

'_I don't want to leave!' she exclaimed in a desperate voice and staggered forward, collapsing in his chest. Sora took her in his arms and prevented them from falling on the ground. 'Kairi please.. don't cry. It makes me sad to see you cry,' he whispered. Kairi was sobbing openly now, and her fists were clenching the fabric of his shirt. 'Promise me that you won't forget about me.'_

_Sora's arms tightened around her. 'I promise,' he said and softly kissed her forehead. Kairi's father then impatiently pressed the claxon, and the sound made Kairi and Sora draw away from each other with akward looks on their faces._

'_I guess I'm leaving then..' Kairi said and gave Sora a watery smile. She turned around, and wanted to walk away, but stopped when she felt Sora's warm hand around hers. _

'_Wait, there's something I need to tell you!' he said in desperate voice. Kairi glanced over her shoulder and looked into his pleading eyes._

'_No need to, you can tell me when I'm coming to visit you. We'll see each other soon,' she said and climbed into the car. She waved at her friends until she could no longer see them because the car had turned into another street. She glanced out of the window, and her heart almost skipped a beat when she saw Sora running down the pavement, desperately waving his arms and trying to keep up with the car. The tears were running down her face again because she suddenly realized that she was not going to come back here. _

_Eventually Sora stopped running, because he could not keep up, but from the window she could see him shouting something. It must've been what he wanted to tell her, but she could not hear… And then he was out of her sight, and at the same time out of her reach. Forever._

…

The doorbell was ringing. Once, twice. Then it rung again after a short pause. Sora slowly opened his eyes and blinked against the bright light. His heart was beating in his chest and he felt like his stomach was turned upside down, but that was nothing compared to the awful headache that was torturing him. It was not the first time that he had drunk alcohol, but he had never in his life had a hangover like now.

Sora slowly lifted himself in a sitting position and looked around the room. Apparently he had slumped down on the couch in the living room yesterday, and hadn't woken up anymore. Roxas was lying at Sora's feet with a pillow tightly pressed against his head. Sora poked his brother with his feet, and then sat down on him when he got no response. This immediately woke Roxas. He roared upright, pushed Sora off him, and stumbled towards the toilet. The doorbell rang again and he finally realized what had woken him up in the first place. He slowly staggered towards the front door and opened it.

'You look awful,' Kairi stated with a frown. Sora tilted his head to eye her doubtfully. 'You don't, why are you here?' he asked, trying not to sound rude, but it was simply because he had forgotten.

Kairi gave him a stern look and walked in. 'You forgot, didn't you?' she said with a deep sigh and turned around to look at him. Sora was suddenly very well aware that he really did look awful, as the reflection of the mirror on the other side of the room showed. He was white in the face, with dark bags under his eyes and something sticky had nestled itself in his spikes. He was still dressed in the jeans he had worn last night, but had somehow managed to take of his shirt last night because he was bare-chested, showing of his muscles. Kairi must've noticed too because she was now staring at his stomach.

'I drank a little bit too much last night,' Sora said offering her a grin, and he suddenly remembered that she was here to celebrate the upcoming new year's eve. In the background they could hear Roxas throw up, but he quickly dragged her into the hallway. He carefully closed the door behind them to drown out the sounds his brother was making.

'I'll take a shower in just a minute and make sure Roxas is okay, then we can start celebrating. But first we need to talk,' he said firmly and folded his arms. 'Why did you run away yesterday?'

He watched as she lowered her eyes, but she started to talk nonetheless, to his surprise. 'I just can't do this anymore, okay? I'm in love with you, I have been ever since we were young, but I cannot contain myself anymore. I love you so much Sora, and just being friends with you isn't enough for me anymore. Why do you think that I refused to take your calls and all that, it's because I loved you so much it hurt because I knew I would never see you again. And I know that you feel something for me too. All this time I've doubted whether you did or did not like me, but you've proven it to be right when you almost kissed me yesterday. But then Riku came in, and I felt disappointed.' Kairi took a deep breath and looked at Sora. 'I want us to be more than friends.'

Sora sighed deeply and rubbed the back of his head. He was extremely surprised by her sudden confession, but relieved and happy at the same time.

'You know.. Yesterday night when we almost kissed.. I thought you were playing a game with me. I thought you wanted us to hide because you did not want Riku to see us together. I thought you were.. in love with him,' he said and laughed softly at his own stupidity.

The tension silence hung like them like a curtain. They were now staring at each other, but neither were saying anything.

That was, until Sora stormed forward and pinned Kairi against the wall passionately kissing her. Kairi immediately responded, kissing him back. Sora stopped for a short moment and gazed at her. 'I've told you two years ago when you left, and now I'm telling you again. I love you incredibly much, Kairi. To me you're the world, the universe and everything else. I've barely been living this past few months, barely breathing because of your absence, but we're finally together now,' he whispered, and then they kissed again.

...

**_Any comments, questions or critiscm?_**


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